A tale of quarantine at the Joshi's - Part 1

This tale talks about the life of 4 individuals brought together by God as family, but brought together under one roof at the same time after many years by the virtue of the ongoing coronavirus! The characters of this Shakespearean tale are ---

Dad Joshi – the loud one

Daughter Joshi – the young one; also the narrator

The other Daughter Joshi – younger than the young one

Mom Joshi – the feared one

Don't go by these innocent faces, they are devilish!

DAY 1

My exams are over and my college is over. I have to stay at home until my joining date is confirmed which would obviously be delayed because of the viral virus in our lives. It would be fine; I can survive at home. Let me tell you a little bit about myself, I am a self-taught introvert-loner who prefers alone time. So, while for some this quarantine is a curse, for me it is almost a routine! I have planned everything, I will not let these days lay to waste. Here is a list of potential things I would do:

1. Wake up at 7 at least
2. Write more blogs
3. Skincare
4. Workout
5. Netflix
6. Read
7. Sleep
8. Nap

This is a totally achievable and realistic To-do List.

DAY 2

Things are getting more severe; everything is not as I planned. I napped more than 3 times and I am still sleepy. Oh my, I think I am slipping in a comma. Also, I woke up at 9 (not bad). The goal for tomorrow is 8:30, after all, it takes time to inculcate good habits. Yeah, and about the virus, things are getting more severe there too. Now my sister is also home quarantined. It’s okay, cool social distancing at home too; I would be in one room and she would be in another. It’s almost equivalent to not being in the same house. No, we don’t hate each other but our likes and dislikes are poles apart. What I like she dislikes and what she likes I dislike, but we both hate Dhinchak Pooja's songs. So social distancing is a must to save us from killing each other. We survived 15 years together we can survive 15 days for sure. It was pretty good actually, we gossiped non stop for three hours. We discussed our past, present, and future. We bitched about almost everyone we know, we also bitched about some strangers and celebrities. It was a pretty good day! Home quarantine isn't such a bad thing especially when you are with your loved ones. 

Also, I don't know if it qualifies as skincare or not but I applied body lotion today after my bath on the face, the face is also body, Right? 

DAY 3

I woke up at 10. I over Netflixed yesternight, a season actually. I am ashamed. I have no self-control but anyway it is all cool and fine because at least I am not passing around the virus, like some stupid people who are escaping their quarantines. Why would they do that?

Also, now my dad is home quarantined. His corporate has finally decided that the health of employees is almost as important as the sales, surely second important. It is three of us now, which is equal to the number of rooms we have, meant to be! Each of us will have a room. But there is a thing, I live in government apartments and for some reason, every room here has two doors opening in other adjacent rooms, which would have helped the people to escape in the early independence years when there were a lot of riots which is so irrelevant now because we don’t allow the protestants to reach this part of Delhi any more.   

Anyway, the issue is I can hear my dad on his work-from-home phone calls ALL THE TIME!! I know how much sales he wants, who is performing well and who isn’t; I can almost make the profit and loss statement for him. Just when I thought I am the only one suffering my sister came from another room burning in anger, telling him to be quiet. My dad shouts on the phone because otherwise how else would he be audible to people miles away; I mean the astronauts.

We three are in the cold war zone now; we are glancing at each other with cold stares that shout WHY ARE YOU HERE? The kitchen is like a battleground where instead of sword fights we have stare fights. My dad is surely thinking, “I wish I had just one child or no child at all.” Let’s hope that tomorrow would be better and productive, I will wake up early and do some chores.

DAY 4

I woke up at 11. What the hell is happening? But I kinda like this pattern, notice how I am waking up exactly one hour later each day, it’s so cool. My brain is following a pattern, I am a genius. To avoid any cold wars today, I have decided that I would be silently cleaning my bookshelf. I think it has worms and some deadly viruses too, not corona but certainly some virus; I don’t want to be responsible for another pandemic.

It has been four hours; it is more difficult than I thought. I am losing my mind. How is this possible? How did I ever fit all these books, papers, registers in this tiny shelf? It's all messed up now, I am angry. I can still hear my dad on the phone.

I did 10 full squats while picking up books and placing them on the shelf, so it is basically squatting with weights; workout goals achieved. Now my back is hurting and so is my neck and I CAN STILL HEAR MY DAD ON THE PHONE! Who the hell invented phones? Why are people not discovering a better way to communicate like telepathy or something?

An hour later I am done with this sorting of the bookshelf, I will never again try to take up a task like this without backup and therapy. All that said, I am very glad with what an incredible makeover I did.

In the evening, if 4:30 qualifies as an evening, my mother came back from her office. Her boss asked them to leave early which is such a rarely found phenomenon in the world! I guess the fear of getting infected is making us humans again. Well almost, my father complained to my mother about how frustrated he is from me and my sister. He wants my mother to take one of us with her to the office from tomorrow; After all, it’s their shared responsibility, tolerating us. Where did that come from? Just one cupboard sorting meltdown and my dad wants to disown me? Did I mention that he needs tea 5 times a day and goes like, “Girls, chai”. I think the third world war would take place right here, at Joshi residency!

This is what I did in 5 hours!

DAY 5

I woke up at 11:30. I am disheartened, my pattern broke! My mind is so stupid. Anyway, new days come with new challenges and we learn to deal with each of them in our unique ways. Today, I faced the worst challenge of the past few days, my sister ate my breakfast. I am smart, I am polite, I am intelligent and I am innovative. I overcame that challenge by eating her lunch. She is clever but she can’t beat me! My sister is fighting with my dad because she doesn't like his new french beard. The tolerance for each other is going down in this house!

Anyway, my mom came back from office today at 3:30, she also has a pattern. Also, she has a piece of news, from next week she is home quarantined too! Now here comes the trouble with mom being home, she nags all the time! I love my mom and I love all moms; moms are great they are the best but they nag! From next week, the cold war would turn into an actual war! Who will sustain? And who would run out in the streets to actually catch the coronavirus to avoid this mental pandemic at home?

WILL THE JOSHI'S SURVIVE THE QUARANTINE OR WOULD THEY RATHER DIE OF CORONA...... TO BE CONTINUED!

Stay home, stay safe and do share my blogs if you like them! 😇

FOR PART - 2, CLICK HERE