New Rules of Love

 

Let me begin by explaining why I am writing this blog. There are three reasons;
number one I am currently reading a book called ‘Forty Rules of Love’ and I thought to myself why not? Why not must I write my own rules of love?

Number two, although I seem like an awfully unromantic person, on the inside deep down, actually very deep down, roughly 40 km below the sea level, I hope to find a love that Shakespeare wrote about.

Number three, I just feel like writing from dusk until dawn today!

So, let’s begin!!!!

👉RULE NUMBER ONE

The first rule of love should be ‘it should include two people’. I know people say all kinds of crap like love yourself, and to be honest, I am one of those people, but the point is don’t just love yourself. Love other people too, please. If you believe in that shit called one-sided love, I don’t even want to tell you how preposterous that sounds. It is just your ego refusing to let go…

👉RULE NUMBER TWO

You should like the same television series. It is of utmost importance, imagine having to live with someone who doesn’t like FRIENDS or someone who likes Money Heist. Yes, I don’t like Money Heist okay, kill me. On the upside since most people like it, I can find my soulmate easier than you suckers. (I am kidding, the people who read my blogs are the best people in the world and I am thankful to you all)

👉RULE NUMBER THREE

Date someone way hotter than you. The only thing that Netflix ever taught us is that we must fall in love with somebody who is out of our league and eventually through the force of the universe you end up getting them. Not only Netflix, but Big Bang Theory also taught us the same. Love out of your league people!

👉RULE NUMBER FOUR

If you haven’t met the right person yet, don’t worry sima aunty is here to help you out. Sima Taparai, the best matchmaker from Mumbai is my latest favorite person. Don’t be surprised if I feature in the next season of Indian Matchmaking to find my one true arranged love!

Facts: Indian Matchmaking is the latest Netflix show that is entirely based on true events!

👉RULE NUMBER FIVE

Don’t just fall for the looks, emphasize other important aspects as well, like the quality of the memes they share. It is very important that you share a similar sense of humor vis a vis the type of meme you share. Otherwise, it's just not a match made in heaven.

👉RULE NUMBER SIX

Match your kundlis first. Because ultimately your efforts are useless if the stars don’t align in your favor.

👉RULE NUMBER SEVEN

Check for exes, the lesser the better. You can lie about everything if the person you are dating is practically a noob in the dating business. So don’t rule out the freshers.

👉RULE NUMBER EIGHT

Don’t take rejections seriously. If somebody ever didn’t respond to your love don’t take it personally. Take a deep breath and just let it go and obviously later write a scathing email to their parents stating what a manner less child they raised. I am just kidding (or am I?).

👉RULE NUMBER NINE

Don’t ever ever for any reason no matter what, break somebody’s heart on purpose! You have a precious little responsibility towards a person who trusts you, don’t ever break their trust! It is not that hard.

👉RULE NUMBER TEN

Bollywood love is not real love! I recently watched the movie ‘Namestey London’ and I realized what a delusional teenager I was, thinking that it was true love.  I don’t know what love is but a guy falling in love with a girl who did not consider there wedding to be real is not love!

👉RULE NUMBER ELEVEN

I want to be with someone

who dreams of doing everything in life,

and nothing

on a rainy Sunday afternoon…

Courtesy: Love Her Wild, Atticus

👉RULE NUMBER TWELVE

Most of the problems of the world stem from linguistic mistakes and simple misunderstandings. Don’t ever take words at face value. When you step into the zone of love, language as we know it becomes obsolete. That which cannot be put into words can only be grasped through silence.  

Courtesy: Forty Rules of Love, Elif Shafak

Go on fall in love 💗